I suppose like I mentioned in the earlier post, the fleshside tends to crop up and tries thwack your head off with an axe when you're not looking. Like this morning for example, I woke up to a slew of yells over the phone and when I put it down, first thing in my head was... "...wth". And I'm so thankful, that it IS in this season that we're a little more sensitive towards the cowpat that's trying to fly around on catapult launches.

So I propped myself up in bed and starting proclaiming some goodness into the supernatural realm. And I gotta admit, feels good to whoop ass early in the morning if you know what I mean.

And then of course I come downstairs, and first impact is that... today is my off day, I should reward myself, by allowing myself to game. Well, at least one game I was reasoning. Even to the point where I could do a substitute fast. But so far, His grace and mercy is sufficient for me and I haven't pressed my short cut keys to bring up the programs. Haha.

But it's ever so subtle. Creeping up like a neenjaz and then tries to lop off your head. And scarier still, it has this habit of making "sense". That it's "ok" and "alright" and "why not?". So today, early in the morning, I have learned the value of discipline.

I think it was in the first post that I mentioned, if my flesh won't obey me, I will make it obey. Guess I'm eating those words right now. Gotta say, burnt flesh can taste pretty good.

Pressing on.
=Keith. =)

PS: Tomorrow morning I leave for Singapore. Keep me in heart. =)

Day 6 - I still have this red eye rolling around in my right eyeball socket. Someone told me it's possibly conjunctivitis. Have no idea. All I know, is if i'm not healed by tonight. I will rip this eyeball out. I mean, I will go and see a doctor tomorrow morning. Haha.

But in any circumstances, today was another early day... because for some reason, someone told me that today's speaker at church was only gonna be around for the earlier service. Which I then found out to be not true. He was also around for the latter service. Grr. But I guess it was all good, I had to do some research observations in some other part of the church. =)

So right after all that stuff, was bit of a leader's meeting with the peeps from Narrowstreet. All good and dandy as usual. Went home, and voila, had durians! =D

This coming Tuesday, I'll be headed down to Singapore for training though. So I probably will not have the chance to be blogging about my current run of experiences. I mean, so far I find it interesting, but more like for us to see what's being built up in the whole arena of the spiritual realm.

Like, even as I'm typing all this now, I realize the lure of breaking fast is when we're idle. And I'm sure we all sorta know the saying that goes: "The idle mind is the devil's workshop". I find it sorta true for some reason. Especially during these 40 days, distractions and all forms of nuisances (red eye!!!!!!) will definitely be headed over. And this is the time we pick up the ugly stick, and beat it silly!

So... with this, I'm off to pray. Because I feel the lure of gaming passing by my red eyeball. Makes me upset to no end, but I'm determined to take one for the kingdom of my Lord and Savior. Keep me in prayers. We all need each other one way or another, secretly and not-so-secretly. =)

So Day 5 is over and man was it one hecka day. Didn't have much of a chance to even think about games because I was out with Narrowstreet busy changing lives. In many good ways, will blog about this as a seperate feel once I get the pictures in and uploaded.

Also, didn't want to even consider gaming because my right eye has been totally swelled and red for the past 3 days consecutively, like from morning to night past the sleep and wake up with it still red kinda red-red. Lol. No idea what the heck it is. But am praying that it will pass off by tomorrow morning. I declare it in this season of authority and power. Amen! Lol. =)

But yeah, yesterday was a day of action and truth I guess in reaching out to the community. I mean, how often do you get to make kids smile and simply impart to them this feeling of friendship. We're so selfish most of these times. But we forget for children, it's the simple essence of availing ourselves to be their friends. Kk, I'm diverging off the topic.

Honestly, Day 5 was harrowing. I was a total mess. Head all over the place, eyeball hurting the crap outta my socket, heart uncertain about things, etc, etc and etc. I could keep on complaining. But here's where God shows up and reminds me that it's not about me. It's not about my troubles or achievements. It's about the being part of the pursuit of greatness. And "whoever wants to be great, he must first be a servant". So this is what I am.

A servant.

Such a profound word for this season of making change. Making change gets too easily into our heads. It blinds us and makes us drunk. Which is why I'm so humbled to be reminded that I am a servant of the Most High. Making changes His way. Not mine. So as I continue on with this journey, all I can indeed say is....

"Expect great things from God, attempt great things from God." - William Carey.

PS: Day 6 is en route. =)

So this is Day 4 of my JXP. As usual, another day at work in the office, mulling and pulling all over my name lists and logistics. And I think at the end of the day, why I love playing games is because it kinda gives me this sense of not only destress, but like, "yeah, i got a highscore" or something like that. No time to really go figure this out, but was just a thought.

Mid-day today, I decided to grab a timeout to just sit down and pray. I mean, I've never been so adamant bout doing this before. So I guess there's a first time for big steps like this.

Just one thing I felt about today's prayer time. I just felt that we must become and we must also raise up the next generation, to be a generation that testifies. If we are not a generation of testimonies... what have we really become?

This short note, ends Day 4 of my JXP.

I might be in Singapore tomorrow, till Friday. Hopefully I can find somewhere to sit down and do a little blogging. Till then, gonna keep biting the rope and holding on.

Centurion of Faith,
Keith.

We can create it. After all, the world is constantly in motion.

"In motion, the future always is". - Master Yoda.

I believe with all my heart we can produce change. We can bring it about. We can set it in motion. We can make it become engaged with our lives and governed by truth. It's simply the matter of breaking out of the box.

In this world, there are two types of people. Those who are the head. And those who are the tail. The question is obvious: which are we?

We've been called to be head. Oh, come on! You gotta be crapping me to say that all we are able to do is follow. I wanna spearhead change. Transformation. Counter-culture. It's not about different. It's about being the lead wire. It's about being the frontline. It's about creativity, uniqueness, relevance IN reverence.

I mentioned once to my spiritual father, who happens to be my Senior Pastor, that we're always one step behind the world. It's so frustrating because I'm such a firm believer in being the frontrunner of change and creation. I become frustrated when we're always behind. That everything we do, is a result of a chain reaction stemming from those who are ahead. I don't want to be the ripple, I want to be the cause of the ripple.

But at the end of Day 3 I just sense something incredible happening as I'm breaking into the anointing and the heart of God. I sense this whole stirring of creation happening. I sense this whole outburst of the Kingdom. I sense the rise of a new generation.

My heart, is stirred by the wonder that is so near.

The anointing is headed our way. And we have only one option.

Get ready.

-Keith. Here we go, last 40 days of life. Last 40 days.

I've decided, that although I could always post funny stuff and crap, it all boils down to a little meaningless bubble of words. So, with that, what I'll be doing is that I will instead, continue on with my countless of deep blogging thoughts, but that doesn't mean I'll be omitting funny posts. Hehe. But however, I have decided that since a whole bunch of us will be doing this whole 40 days prayer and fasting thing - I'll blog about the experience.

Hence, why this post is entitled, My 40 Days JXP.

What's JXP?
Twofold scenario: Jesus eXPerience and Journalling eXPerience. =)

So I'll be blogging at least the 40 days worth of stuff that's happening. Hopefully more than just normal days. Seeing as today is Day 3 already, and that I'll be away in Singapore for bout a week or two, I'll have to do multiple postings on the days.

First question: What am I fasting?

Answer: Cyber/Digital Gaming - which means all forms of flash games, playstations, online gaming, cybercafes, pc games, etc.

Day 1 - I had some serious struggle issues with coping with the sudden change. At some points, I was discussing with myself the option of letting myself play 1 game. But really, by the amazing grace of God, I somehow managed to pull myself together and walk away to pray. It's not like I'm totally addicted to gaming, but it is my main destresser and funtime. Haha. So yeah, was a huge breakthrough to set myself up to keep pressing on. Thanks Jesus. Owe you heaps. =)

Day 2 - Was in church doing work, but the main challenge was avoiding the flash games creeping around the corners while i'm stressing out managing like 200 over names for the Children At Risk launch we're conducting this coming Saturday. In the end, I decided to destress myself by running off to my little secret hiding spot to pray for myself and those I've committed myself to pray for. One thought: God's grace is amazing and his love endures forever.

Day 3 - So far, I'm still in church right now. Mulling over the 200 names and logistics still. Pondering how I can execute this with maximum efficiency and with the lowest logistical errors. Yes, I have high demands on the quality of work I produce. No good = back to the drawing board. Good = How can I do better. Perfectionist? Nah, just fussypotting over things for whatever reasons. So far, it's still avoid flash games. I <3 flash games cuz they crack me up with all the senseless violence. Hehe.

Will be back with Day 4 tomorrow, and a little bit of sharing on how the past few days has been in terms of prayer and what I sense God is about to unleash as we break-in via fasting, expecting a break-out anointing.

Stay tuned. Buckle up. It's the last 40 days of our lives.

Edit PS: One thing about fasting, it's about bearing the cost. If there is no cost, there is no sacrifice. The more I reasoned not to fast gaming, the more I knew the need was to fast it. It's about beating the fleshman senseless into being obedient to the Spirit. If it's not gonna listen, I'm gonna make it listen. =) Sounds vicious somehow, and I very likey. Hahaha.

Oh, if you're part of the last 40 days of life, and wanna pray for me...

Here's my prayer request:
That I will find clear direction for my heart. Wherever God is leading me.

I've heard this word so often it has perhaps almost lost it's meaning. We speak about existing for this generation, for the purposes of place-something-noble-here, for the future, for hope, for glory, for this and that and that and this. But let me ask you a question...

How many of us actually do this whole existing thing?

Perhaps some of us are all talk no substance?

The harsh reality hits home sometimes. Especially when we sit down and try to sum up our lives in the things we have done and what we've lived for. Martin Luther King Jr, says it most powerfully and harshly: If a man has not found something worth dying for, he is not fit to live.

It hurts me the most when I look back at my life and realized, I could've done so much more if only I had a deeper understanding of my existance. The if-monster can be an incredible thorn in the gluteous maximus anytime. It stings when we allow it to get a good bite.

But perhaps the actual problem really isn't the if-monster. Perhaps it's the fact we are the conjurers of this beast. That we allow it to exist even though we would prefer it not to. And then we simply fall back into the motion of time and routine, and allow ourselves to be robbed by this monster we conjured.

Why?

SImply because we do not have an understanding of exist.

Do we exist for this generation? Yes, we do!

Do we exist for greater purposes in life? Heck, definitely.

Do we exist for the future? Doh.

Do we exist for the other 4849112498412385 reasons? Perhaps minus a few.

In short, we do exist. But there's a difference between those of us who exist in the patterns of creation, and those simply in the pattern. There's a difference between those of us who live creating history, and those of us who are simply fading into the backgrounds of history. There is a difference between those actively living out their existence, and those merely watching it pass by.

At the end of the day, we have to seize to exist. Or we will cease to exist.

Especially in regards to the current times and seasons. There is this whole sensational feeling about the window of opportunity we have for life and our nation. Kinda like the make-or-break feeling. And be assured, be very assured in fact, that it's coming. It will come.

And it will pass us by. Especially if we're so caught up in the whole idea of receving, and forget to activate what we've received. All that revelation and information must lead to a transformation via a spiritual and physical activation, or it'll only end up in pure constipation. It saddens me to see that there has been such a great release of truth and revelation, but not a release of the power it has.

So yeah, the much anticipated Parents Appreciation Day at SIBKL has been produced. You can check out the songs and videos on Youtube. Just Youtube SIBKL and you should be able to pick out the songs and tags easily enough.

Make sure to check out the ever amazing song "One LIttle Heartbeat at a Time". So utterly amazing. Too bad for all it's worth on the net, this is nothing whatsoever compared to the live performance. Hopefully the media crew has a proper recording fuse of the songs. Would love to get my hands on a copy. Haha.

I wanna especially thank the many unspoken heros and heroines that served as part of the Ushering Team for the P.A.D event. Words cannot express not only my thankfulness but the inspiration drawn from seeing young people serve in such a humble and limelightless position. And on top of that to serve in a capacity that has such incredible challenges.

You are all indeed more than overcomers.

You are inspirers of setting the example for all believers.

Especially myself. You guys know who you are, and I know every single one of you, and I just really wanna say thank you. Seldom do you find a church with the capacity to inspire young people to rise to the challenge. I'm extremely blessed taking on the job of liasing with each and everyone of you.

You make a difference not only in the area of this ministry, but with every life you greeted with a smile and handshake. Keep living passionately and "do not let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity".

This is the challenge of this generation. Let's step up to the game.

And of course not forgetting the wonderful and amazing KidZone teachers and helpers who many, in spite, of their hectics schedules and worksheets - took time off to come up with the game booths, polaroids, and gifts. You guys never cease to amaze me with incredible ideas and with your excellent spirit. And thank you for helping out with the gift distribuition. I realize now kids are an incredible source of labor. Joking joking. Hahaha. They're amazing. =)

You're all amazing because of the generous love you serve with.

They're all popping out. Haha.

Congratulations Boo and Le Lean on the birth of baby Joseph. Man he's a huge kid. =)

Looking forward to meet the big guy. =)

I'm sitting here, headset on, listening to some Namesake. Incredibly excellent music. Incredibly. So yeah, just sitting here chilling and my heart is for some reason feeling inspired.

Inspired by the awesome chats I've had with people lately, especially my mentors, the times I spent at the bus stop doing my No Compromise devotional material and being simply amazed at how God will poke at my heart when I least expect it.

Inspired to change the world because on the bus I saw two people fighting. Inspired to change one life at a time because I overheard this guy shouting at his girlfriend over the handphone in the corridor. Inspired because the music I'm listening to is reminding me to follow Jesus, to walk with Him, to run to Him.

Inspired towards no turning back from the destiny I've been born to conquer. No turning back from my surrendering. No turning back because there's no Keith Plan B. I was born for a time like this, and I'm inspired to live out my purpose.

Inspired because when I think about my past, and the mistakes I've done, the time I've wasted, the journey as a whole, I know God is the only One, Who could've breathed new life into me. Everytime I think about the goodness of my King and Savior, I know, I have to keep going on. I know I have to play my part in changing the climate and history of my nation and its peoples. I just gotta get this Jesus Syndrome out into the open.

Inspired because I heard on the radio today, that most days, our heads get us a little dream and inspiration to do something adventurous and life changing, we think bout it 2 seconds, then let reality pry it away from viciously. Why?

Why?

Why do we let these dreams and inspirations go? Why do we bow down to the pressures of society? Why do we give up our passions for something so much lesser? Why do we desire a mediocre life? Why do allow goodness to take the place of greatness...

When I heard this over the radio today, something in my Spirit snapped. Saying to go for something greater than life. To go for the dream.

Father, today allow me to pursue You. Pursue your purposes. Pursue greatness in bringing a revolution to life. In bringing the Truth. In living the Passion. In journeying with You. I will settle for nothing less but Your fullness in my life and heart. Be close I ask you in Jesus' name. Amen. *winkGod*